Biblical Fatherhood

The countdown is on. There remains 111 days untill we celebrate Father’s Day across the United States. It’s a day when we give cards, gifts, affection, and attention to fathers. As we think forward to that day, I want to submit this for all fathers to consider: Biblical fatherhood involves discipleship through intentional choices that positions our children to encounter the fatherheart of God.

While on a recent daddy-daughter date with my youngest daughter, I read to her a post I’d written earlier that day; it highlighted the life of Dawson Trotman and his commitment to disciple young people through hearing, reading, studying, memorizing, and meditating on the Word of God. Then we talked about the importance of reading and memorizing Scripture verses from the Bible. I challenged her to be more intentional daily to read her Bible in order to memorize the Scriptures so that she can grow in her walk with Christ. In closing, I challenged her to recite to me a verse she had read and memorized during our next date together in March.

As a father, it is imperative that I am intentional to disciple my children. Obviously as dads, we should be the very first line of discipleship that our children experience. The reality is this: As fathers we intentionally and unintentionally disciple our children, either in the image of Christ or the world. Even if we don’t have a clear cut methodology, our lives are exerting influence upon them, for better or worse.

That’s sobering.

First, fathers who claim to be born again believers, need to have an intentional, active, life-giving relationships with Christ as they daily pursue Him through the Scriptures and prayer. This means that as fathers, we must say goodbye to the hypocritical, “Do as I say, not as I do” approach to fathering and discipling our children.

Here are several important questions to ponder.

• What do our kids think of us based on what they see us do day in, day out?
• Do our lives inspire them to pursue Christ wholeheartedly?
• How do they see us treating our wives when no one else is around as our tongues lash them with sharp, critical words?
• How do we treat others in front of them when we are slighted or agitated?
• How do we prioritize and spend our spare time away from work?

Our choices make a difference in the lives of our children. Are you like the father whom I read about recently whose son walked into his office only to find him watching pornography on his computer? Eventually that which is done in secret will be seen by our kids regardless of what we tell them.

As fathers, we owe it to our wives and children to heed the words of Paul, “I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called” (Ephesians 4:1). That life begins with choices made in secret that are consistent with the nature and character of God as revealed through the Word of God. As fathers, we need to be the first to repent of any hypocrisy or duplicity in our lives.

Are you struggling today to be the father that you are called to be due to choices you’ve previously made?

The invitation from heaven is for you to experience “God’s kindness [that] is meant to lead you to repentance” (Romans 2:4). Come clean. Allow the precious blood of Lamb of God to fasten your faith in Christ alone for His forgiveness and to “cleanse you from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). In the grace of God, commit yourself in God’s hand to embrace the process of repentance until “you bear fruit in keeping with repentance” (Matthew 3:8). The best fathers are those who learn to cultivate a lifestyle of repentance both privately and publicly so that their choices reflect the very heart of God the Father.

God’s grace will enable each one of us to become the father we were meant to become. As we do so, the choices we make in secret and in public will have direct influence upon the lives of our children. Become a wholehearted, obedient follower of Christ so that you have the Spirit-initiated capacity to disciple your own children for the better. The countdown is on. Let’s make everyday count as godly fathers who are making a difference in the lives of our children for the glory of God.